Merrily Fanthing Along

Anonymous asked asktheimprobableinvestigators: How tall are the two of you?

asktheimprobableinvestigators:

175.26.

UGH FOR FUCK’S SAKE DO IT IN NORMAL UNITS OF MEASUREMENT.

CAN I HELP IT. IF THE METRIC SYSTEM IS VASTLY SuPERIOR TO IMPERIAL. IN EVERY SINGLE FACET. AND WAY.

I FUCKING HATE THE METRIC SYSTEM.

YOu JuST HATE DOING THE MATH IN YOuR HEAD.

THAT TOO. HE’S AROUND 5’9” I WOULD SAY. I’M

FuN SIZE.

OH WOW. WOULD YOU LOOK AT THIS. IT’S AN ENTIRE GODDAMN PHALANX OF MIDDLE FINGERS ALL POINTING YOUR WAY IN PERFECT PRACTICED UNISON. AND NOW—YES—I THINK—YES, THEY’RE DOING A COMPLICATED COLOR GUARD ROUTINE THAT SPELLS OUT IN BLOCK CAPITALS “GO FUCK YOURSELF.”

I JuST CAN’T GET OVER. HOW DARLING IT IS WHEN YOu DO THAT.

I WONDER WHO’S NOT GOING TO BE GETTING ANY FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE? IT IS A MYSTERY! —I’M IGNORING YOU. I’M 5’7”, ANON.

OKAY. FIVE FEET SIX POINT NINE TWO.

…in which Karkat’s middle fingers are in color guard, which is awesome.

(and Karkat as a whole has no right to complain about being short. And Caliborn has even less business calling 5’7”  ‘FuN SIZE’; seriously, what are they even using for comparison?)